Basketball must be played on asphalt or hard wood. But some big-thinking Big 12 noobs thought it was time to put the glass to the test.
That idiot is conference commissioner Brett Yormark, who installed a high-tech LED court made of glass for the league’s tournament in Kansas City this week. Glass is fine for the backboard, but as has become clear since the tournament began, the floor is not glass. Now they are removing it. CBS Sports reported Thursday night that the commissioner, who came to the Big 12 after serving as COO of Jay Z’s Roc Nation, has decided to yank his avant-garde exterior and replace it with a “traditional hardwood court.” Yormark said he made his decision after speaking with “the coaches of the four semifinal teams.”
Maybe you could have added “and a personal injury attorney.”
With about 8 1/2 minutes left in the Iowa State-Texas Tech quarterfinals, the glass court experiment began to wind down. Red Raider Christian Anderson slipped and fell awkwardly on an inbounds play while trying to escape a double team. Whoever was working on Fool’s Court’s LED arsenal made sure the lights looked great on an ESPN overhead shot of Anderson lying on his back writhing in pain. The second-year guard, who was selected first-team All Big 12 earlier this week, limped to the bench still clutching his naughty side. He did not return for Iowa State’s 75-53 win.
Anderson’s groin pull came just one possession after Tech’s LeJuan Watts landed on a slippery surface and injured his foot. The loss could not be blamed on injuries, as the skills were already exploding when key players began to fall. But Anderson and Watts said in post-game interviews that it was time for the committee to end his experiment. They see the basketball court like this: Seinfeld’s Newman saw the chicken at Kenny Rogers Roasters. What makes chicken good is wood.
“Let’s just do it on a tree,” Watts said.
“I think going back to regular court is the way to go,” Anderson said.
Players had already expressed the view that the conference’s new court was broken before games started slipping away at Tech. Kansas State’s Khamari McGriff came out of Wednesday’s game against BYU complaining of a migraine, which he attributed to the constant flashing lights beneath his feet. He was caught on camera covering his head with a towel and trying to turn to the right. Teammate Taj Manning took the court after the game. “The floor is not good,” he said. “They shouldn’t bring it back. It’s just an eyesore. It’s constantly changing, different lights and things flashing. No one wants to play with it.”
Wood’s return came too late for the Big 12 women, whose tournament was held on the same court a week earlier, prompting complaints from players.
The tournament court has been described as “the first all-glass floor used for a legal basketball game in American history.” Yormark has worked to add Euro flair to the historically heartland-centric Big 12. He hosted the season-opening Iowa State vs. Kansas State football game in Dublin. This special glass bottom model has been used by several Euroleague teams. CBS Sports reported that a Zurich-based company called ASB GlassFloor designed the floor. This Swiss city is known for its smooth sports surfaces. There are currently two NHL players from Zurich and no NBA players from Zurich. Big 12 leased the floor from ASB GlassFloor for $185,000, including direct installation, labor and on-site technical support. If Anderson’s draft stock drops, the conference’s legal bills could quickly offset the cost of that lease.
Disclosure: I attended Texas Tech and at this point I care more about the Red Raiders basketball team than any other sports entity in my life. and Brett Yormark.‘S fool.
